If Florida Gov. Rick Scott loses his bid for re-election next month, everyone—and I mean everyone—is going to blame this surreal moment from Wednesday night’s debate at Broward College with Democrat Charlie Crist. Trust me when I say that you just need to watch this video:
Scott literally would not come out to debate Crist because, at Crist’s request, a fan had been placed beneath Crist’s podium. A fan. Guess what? It’s freaking hot in Florida—it had been 90 degrees that day in Davie, where the debate was held, with 93 percent humidity. But Scott refused to take the stage because, allegedly, the rules of the debate stated that “no electronics can be used.”
I’m freaking serious.
As the moderators discussed what to do about Scott’s whining, Crist just shredded his absentee opponent. Referring to Scott’s infamous deposition where he refused 75 times to answer questions about the Medicare fraud his health care company committed, Crist interjected:
“That’s the ultimate pleading of the Fifth I ever heard.”
Damn, son! But Crist wasn’t done yet. One grouchy moderator tried to silence Crist, while a befuddled colleague asked the Democrat, “Do the rules of the debate say that there should be no fan?” Yes, she actually asked this. Following some crosstalk, Crist just blew the cover off the ball:
“Are we really going to debate about a fan? Or are we going to talk about education, and the environment and the future of our state. I mean, really!
There are serious issues faces our state, and it’s like funding education appropriately, protecting our environment, making sure we have ethical, honest leadership. I mean, if he’s gonna give it to me, I’m gonna take it!”
The grumpy lead moderator then cut Crist off, insisting, “This is not a platform for one candidate.” But in fact, it very much was:
Scott eventually, finally, painfully realized he must look like a manifest moron and ultimately joined the debate. His explanation for his absurd absence?
Yes, Scott actually claimed he wouldn’t come on stage because he said Crist wasn’t planning to come on stage—only, you know, he was already there. That kind of insane anti-logic is almost perfectly Republican.
This race is incredibly, almost absurdly tight—Crist leads by less than 1 percent in the polling averages—so just about anything could tilt the outcome either way. Of all the things that might determine who will be the next governor of the fourth-largest state in the nation, it really could wind up being this fan. And Rick Scott’s own, instantly legendary stupidity. Ah, Florida. What would we do without you?
